Teller You're Sorry

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A while back and for a number of years, I used to do a feature called Bizarro’s Sunday Punnies and here’s how it worked: About once a month, I’d do a Sunday cartoon with three panels, each of which was my illustrated version of a pun submitted by readers. (See example below) I’m thinking of reviving it so if you’ve got a pun that you’ve been aching to see drawn by a somewhat professional cartoonist like myself, send it to me! The rules are simple:

1) It must be your original idea, not something you heard or saw somewhere.

b) By submitting, you agree that you are donating the idea forever and will not receive compensation other than seeing your name (or a phony name of your choice) at the bottom of the panel.

§) Submit your pun suggestion in the comments section of this blog along with the name you want me to use if I choose your pun. (You will NOT see your comment appear in the comments section because I must approve them before they post and I don’t want to ruin the joke for others.) If you can’t post a comment here, send your pun to me via a private message via FB, Twitter, or Instagram.

I think that’s it. Send me some puns, Jazz Pickles!

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Now I’m hankering to see what words Wayno was playing with last week. Follow me down…

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A reader left the following comment on Wayno’s FB post of this one: “Ya gotta wonder who wears the plants in that family.” I can’t do better than that.

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These zombies are no less dead than many of the ancient hippies that used to follow the Grateful Dead around. The Dead haven’t toured in a while, but some are still following them.

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I’ve never used fish oil because my fish never squeak, but I’ve heard that WD40 works just as well.

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This is why I literally never go to canine keggers. That, and the cat poop appetizers.

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They didn’t call Grandpa “The Weasel” for nothing. And it was quite a mess when he finally “popped”.

On a side note, I love watching clown toddlers trying to learn to walk in those huge shoes. If you feel guilty for laughing at falling toddlers, remember that clowns live to be laughed at so it’s totally okay.

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A monarch butterfly was trapped in our house a few days ago and Olive Oyl and I went to a lot of trouble to catch and release it outdoors. The next day, I was hiking the desert with my dogs and stepped on a cactus spine that went through my shoe and into my foot. I was in agony. Just then, a beautiful monarch butterfly (that looked oddly familiar) landed on my shoe, crawled over to the thorn and began pulling on it. I’m not kidding. It didn’t have the strength to pull it out, of course, and so it flew away.

The moral of that story isn’t clear, but wouldn’t your life be clearly more extraterrestrial if it included our BIzarro Shop Featured Item of the Week?! Of course it would. In fact, any of the Bizarro Secret Symbol enamel pins would do just as good a job, so why not buy them all?

We’ve reached the end of this week’s humor harvest, Jazz Pickles. Thanks for helping us bale the gags. If you appreciate what we do and that we give it away for free here (without ads!) toss us a “thanks” via one of the links below. All the critters at Rancho Bizarro will be mightily thankful and you’ll get a warm fuzzy from knowing you did something nice for some good folks.

Until next time, be happy, be smart, be nice, and resist ignorance, fascism, and nationalism.

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Dan Piraro6 Comments